I'd be interested to learn more about the legal side of things here. Apparently sex work is illegal and people get arrested over it, and yet you feel safe admitting to it online, and you provide a list of other sex workers. How does that work?
A priori, I would guess few escorts actually enjoy what they do at all and probably, at best, view it as merely work. Nothing wrong with that, nearly everyone does things they don’t enjoy to make ends meet, but have you or anyone else ever actually done a good survey of what their attitudes actually are toward their work?
"She’s afraid that if she says she doesn’t like something you’re doing, that you’re going to be upset, or sad, or aren’t going to book her anymore.
And if this is in fact true of you, if you want to learn how to please a specific escort but will stop seeing her once she starts telling you what’s not working for her and it’s not a fun casual playground anymore, then don’t ask her to be honest with you. This is not the place to learn to up your sexual game, do not hold your money over a woman’s head and yank it away when she finally gives you honesty."
Is this meant to imply that it's rude *in general* to ask escorts to be honest about how much they're enjoying themselves? Or like, is/are there some qualifier(s) one can add to the request for honesty to make it not-rude?
(Potential) first-timer here, I'm interested in hiring a provider because I want to try out some things a woman I've just begun seeing (semi long-distance) is interested in but that don't come super naturally to me. Fairly vanilla imo but she's submissive and wants to be told what to do, commanded, talked extremely dirty to with some degrading language, etc. I've always been naturally dominant in the hair-pulling, choking, pin-a-girl-down kind of way (only when she asks or clearly signals she likes it, of course) but also very silent verbally as I get a little shy and self-conscious about using my words, don't have natural confidence and ease there.
From what I gather as I start researching, you def. don't want to walk into a new escort experience asking her to get in various submissive poses or get spanked or called degrading names etc. I assume the answer here is just clear communication, but how can I signal to a high-end $1000+ escort before booking (if at all possible) that that's what I'm looking for?
What an informative and nicely written piece. I live in England, where the escort thing isn't illegal. But I do visit the States a few times a year and this was very useful as I had considered it but, until now, had taken no action. Perhaps next time I'm there. Thank you.
Based on evolutionary psychology and hypergamy, it seems like working as an escort (especially a high end one) could be a valid strategy to find high status male partners, immediately enter a sexual relationship, with some prospects of this turning into a standard long term relationships. Do escorts do this? Is there a risk that an escort to pursue a longer relationship? Again, in my evo-psych-brainwashed mind, this seems very likely.
I'd be interested to learn more about the legal side of things here. Apparently sex work is illegal and people get arrested over it, and yet you feel safe admitting to it online, and you provide a list of other sex workers. How does that work?
A priori, I would guess few escorts actually enjoy what they do at all and probably, at best, view it as merely work. Nothing wrong with that, nearly everyone does things they don’t enjoy to make ends meet, but have you or anyone else ever actually done a good survey of what their attitudes actually are toward their work?
Aella, you are amazing with your data and advice. All of this is spot on and will be helpful to newbies and oldies alike. Thank you.
"She’s afraid that if she says she doesn’t like something you’re doing, that you’re going to be upset, or sad, or aren’t going to book her anymore.
And if this is in fact true of you, if you want to learn how to please a specific escort but will stop seeing her once she starts telling you what’s not working for her and it’s not a fun casual playground anymore, then don’t ask her to be honest with you. This is not the place to learn to up your sexual game, do not hold your money over a woman’s head and yank it away when she finally gives you honesty."
Is this meant to imply that it's rude *in general* to ask escorts to be honest about how much they're enjoying themselves? Or like, is/are there some qualifier(s) one can add to the request for honesty to make it not-rude?
(Potential) first-timer here, I'm interested in hiring a provider because I want to try out some things a woman I've just begun seeing (semi long-distance) is interested in but that don't come super naturally to me. Fairly vanilla imo but she's submissive and wants to be told what to do, commanded, talked extremely dirty to with some degrading language, etc. I've always been naturally dominant in the hair-pulling, choking, pin-a-girl-down kind of way (only when she asks or clearly signals she likes it, of course) but also very silent verbally as I get a little shy and self-conscious about using my words, don't have natural confidence and ease there.
From what I gather as I start researching, you def. don't want to walk into a new escort experience asking her to get in various submissive poses or get spanked or called degrading names etc. I assume the answer here is just clear communication, but how can I signal to a high-end $1000+ escort before booking (if at all possible) that that's what I'm looking for?
What an informative and nicely written piece. I live in England, where the escort thing isn't illegal. But I do visit the States a few times a year and this was very useful as I had considered it but, until now, had taken no action. Perhaps next time I'm there. Thank you.
Based on evolutionary psychology and hypergamy, it seems like working as an escort (especially a high end one) could be a valid strategy to find high status male partners, immediately enter a sexual relationship, with some prospects of this turning into a standard long term relationships. Do escorts do this? Is there a risk that an escort to pursue a longer relationship? Again, in my evo-psych-brainwashed mind, this seems very likely.